It’s kind of a dead month in sports. The Vikings are done, the Twins are just starting. The Gopher hoops team is awful, the Gopher hockey team just got swept by the Huskies – and the Wolves/Wild both bore me to tears.
While I know there are many places to get tired, obvious, and predictable commentary/surveys about pop culture, movies, and celebrities, just consider this to be adding to the abyss.
A few random Oscar thoughts and observations…
---
I watched the show with the gal, the gal’s mom, two dogs, and three cats. It was a packed house – all weekend long – at Cold Omaha headquarters. Let’s just say the highlight of the weekend was shoveling two feet of snow. I am kidding, we had pizza too.
---
I didn’t see any of the movies nominated and I honestly didn’t know who was up for best actor or best actress. This really hit home during the opening montage filled with people who were nominated for awards. I was able to name exactly seven of them: Leo. Spielberg. Jennifer Hudson. That guy from Remember the Titans….Gosling? Eastwood. Eddie Murphy.
And…Melisa Ethridge? I was still trying to figure that one out up until the time she performed her song. Wasn’t she kind of pitchy during her time on stage? Randy and Simon would have blasted her for the performance. It was kind of all over the place for me dog, I didn’t love it.
---
Ellen Degeneres hosted the event (no, seriously.) Plus, she wore George Costanza’s velvet suit for the first half of the show, which was actually kind of cute.
---
Ellen Degeneres hosted the Oscars. Who was Plan B – Paula Poundstone?
Billy Crystal said no to hosting just for this year right? They just couldn’t get him, but he’ll be back next year? Okay, good.
---
I always love the recap of the awards that were given out at another time during a ceremony that wasn’t quite as good and therefore really isn’t the same as actually winning an Oscar at the Oscar’s. I feel bad for the people who won those awards, but at the same time -- I am quite thankful we don’t have to sit through them.
---
Will Ferrell, Jack Black and that guy from the Perfect Storm and Talladega Nights sang a song that was pretty funny. Ferrell’s will-fro was the best comedy of the night.
Well…other than this…
---
When I am watching something on TV and both my gal and her mom are in the room -- all bets are off. The following conversation happened last night:
Camera pans the crowd, shows a bloated, and bald-headed Jack Nicholson.
My Gal: "Wow – look at him, he looks puffy!"
Her mom: “Who…?"
My gal: “Jack Nicholson”
Her mom: “Doc Finkelstein? Who?”
Me: “Doc Severenson”
Her mom, thoroughly confused: “Oh”
It's an amazing phenomenon.
I was trying to figure out how to avoid this kind of misunderstanding during an important TV show. For all of you who aren’t married yet, pay attention.
Get two televisions. Best money you will ever spend. Problem is, even if you have three TV’s, sometimes you can’t avoid family time.
or
Have plenty of crossword puzzles, newspapers, or magazines close by and bring those babies out when something good is on TV. This works great during sporting events – when you really want some quiet. The best three magazines are Us Weekly, anything with scrap booking or arts/crafts, and the National Enquirer. There isn’t a woman alive who will admit to reading it, but none of them can turn it down. I have years and years of documented evidence related to this theory. Just trust me.
---
Greg Kinnear will always be that guy on Talk Soup to me.
---
I am still trying to figure out if Jessica Biel is attractive. I asked the gal and she said:”She’s all right, she cute – she’s not too much of anything.” Yep, that about sums her up I think.
---
I can’t help but think of Harlem Nights every time I see promos for Dream Girls.
---
Best Supporting Actor nominee -- Eddie Murphy!
Has a career ever come full circle more than Eddie Murphy’s? He’s the funniest man on the planet in the late 1970’s and early 80’s. He has a couple of huge movies in the mid 80’s, picks up a transvestite in the early 90’s, disappears, does some kids movies, and is now an Academy Award nominee. Just amazing to me.
---
The Departed won for best picture and best director. How have I not seen The Departed yet? I like Matt Damon and Doc Finkelstein! Plus, mob movies are great.
---
I like the bearded Al Gore better than the cleanly-shaved Al Gore. Al pretended that he was going to announce he’s running for president again and the loud music blasted him off the stage. He sold that about as well as he sold the whole “vote for me, I can win” thing.
---
Cameron Diaz is proving that blondes have more fun.
---
Do you think Matt Damon gets angry when Ben Affleck gets introduced as an Academy Award nominated writer? I think it’s been proven that he was the brains behind the operation, how long does Ben get to ride those coattails?
---
The Super Bowl didn’t even run four hours long this year, why does an award show have to drag on forever?
---
At what point in your life do you realize that you can, in fact, get together with your friends and produce silhouettes of all the nominated movies?
While I know there are many places to get tired, obvious, and predictable commentary/surveys about pop culture, movies, and celebrities, just consider this to be adding to the abyss.
A few random Oscar thoughts and observations…
---
I watched the show with the gal, the gal’s mom, two dogs, and three cats. It was a packed house – all weekend long – at Cold Omaha headquarters. Let’s just say the highlight of the weekend was shoveling two feet of snow. I am kidding, we had pizza too.
---
I didn’t see any of the movies nominated and I honestly didn’t know who was up for best actor or best actress. This really hit home during the opening montage filled with people who were nominated for awards. I was able to name exactly seven of them: Leo. Spielberg. Jennifer Hudson. That guy from Remember the Titans….Gosling? Eastwood. Eddie Murphy.
And…Melisa Ethridge? I was still trying to figure that one out up until the time she performed her song. Wasn’t she kind of pitchy during her time on stage? Randy and Simon would have blasted her for the performance. It was kind of all over the place for me dog, I didn’t love it.
---
Ellen Degeneres hosted the event (no, seriously.) Plus, she wore George Costanza’s velvet suit for the first half of the show, which was actually kind of cute.
---
Ellen Degeneres hosted the Oscars. Who was Plan B – Paula Poundstone?
Billy Crystal said no to hosting just for this year right? They just couldn’t get him, but he’ll be back next year? Okay, good.
---
I always love the recap of the awards that were given out at another time during a ceremony that wasn’t quite as good and therefore really isn’t the same as actually winning an Oscar at the Oscar’s. I feel bad for the people who won those awards, but at the same time -- I am quite thankful we don’t have to sit through them.
---
Will Ferrell, Jack Black and that guy from the Perfect Storm and Talladega Nights sang a song that was pretty funny. Ferrell’s will-fro was the best comedy of the night.
Well…other than this…
---
When I am watching something on TV and both my gal and her mom are in the room -- all bets are off. The following conversation happened last night:
Camera pans the crowd, shows a bloated, and bald-headed Jack Nicholson.
My Gal: "Wow – look at him, he looks puffy!"
Her mom: “Who…?"
My gal: “Jack Nicholson”
Her mom: “Doc Finkelstein? Who?”
Me: “Doc Severenson”
Her mom, thoroughly confused: “Oh”
It's an amazing phenomenon.
I was trying to figure out how to avoid this kind of misunderstanding during an important TV show. For all of you who aren’t married yet, pay attention.
Get two televisions. Best money you will ever spend. Problem is, even if you have three TV’s, sometimes you can’t avoid family time.
or
Have plenty of crossword puzzles, newspapers, or magazines close by and bring those babies out when something good is on TV. This works great during sporting events – when you really want some quiet. The best three magazines are Us Weekly, anything with scrap booking or arts/crafts, and the National Enquirer. There isn’t a woman alive who will admit to reading it, but none of them can turn it down. I have years and years of documented evidence related to this theory. Just trust me.
---
Greg Kinnear will always be that guy on Talk Soup to me.
---
I am still trying to figure out if Jessica Biel is attractive. I asked the gal and she said:”She’s all right, she cute – she’s not too much of anything.” Yep, that about sums her up I think.
---
I can’t help but think of Harlem Nights every time I see promos for Dream Girls.
---
Best Supporting Actor nominee -- Eddie Murphy!
Has a career ever come full circle more than Eddie Murphy’s? He’s the funniest man on the planet in the late 1970’s and early 80’s. He has a couple of huge movies in the mid 80’s, picks up a transvestite in the early 90’s, disappears, does some kids movies, and is now an Academy Award nominee. Just amazing to me.
---
The Departed won for best picture and best director. How have I not seen The Departed yet? I like Matt Damon and Doc Finkelstein! Plus, mob movies are great.
---
I like the bearded Al Gore better than the cleanly-shaved Al Gore. Al pretended that he was going to announce he’s running for president again and the loud music blasted him off the stage. He sold that about as well as he sold the whole “vote for me, I can win” thing.
---
Cameron Diaz is proving that blondes have more fun.
---
Do you think Matt Damon gets angry when Ben Affleck gets introduced as an Academy Award nominated writer? I think it’s been proven that he was the brains behind the operation, how long does Ben get to ride those coattails?
---
The Super Bowl didn’t even run four hours long this year, why does an award show have to drag on forever?
---
At what point in your life do you realize that you can, in fact, get together with your friends and produce silhouettes of all the nominated movies?
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3 comments:
kommentator "brad spals" is minus >500<
know how I know you're gay? because you don't know if jessica biel is hot or not. plus she's one of us.
he means shes a dude.
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